You have two options, you and your family can only eat lasagna or pizza for the rest of your lives, which do you choose?
Do you make this decision on your own or do you ask others what they think, I mean this will impact everyone for the rest of their lives?
This question might be considered somewhat insignificant, but our lives are filled with decisions with huge consequences.
Within the family those choices become harder and harder. No decisions made only effect the individual when they are within a family unit.
That is one of the great lies of today, satisfy your needs because you are the most important.
In a family and even a marriage, everyone is impacted, as such, everyone should have a say.
Though this is not common in most families, family councils have the ability to strengthen and unify.
Family councils are meetings where all family members are present to discuss important topics.
These are something commons in some families, but others have never even considered the power that can come through making decisions as a family, parent and child.
Steven R. Covey has suggested that, "Many families are managed on the basis of crises, moods, quick fixes, and instant gratification--not sound principles.
The time families spend together in discussion is for more than just problem solving.
We often hear the saying there are strength in numbers, what does it really mean?
Urban dictionary describes it as “…an emotional and morale strength drawn from a group of people”
Is that not what a family should be, an emotional, even morale strength.
There are several reasons why people, but for this purpose, family members feel connected when they meet together.
In book titled Connecting: How We Form Social Bonds and Communities in the Internet Age, the author explains that, “Even when individuals are brought together in deliberate, commercialized ways, though, they may still discover and develop a sense of common identity and genuine connections to one another. As they are jointly oriented toward common phenomena, they may come to feel unified."
The author then illustrates this point by using the example of the connection people feel to those of their generation, even if they did not grow up together. While some of it has to do with the commercial items they all owned, it was about the connection they felt through sharing similar experiences.
This concept can be directly related to families.
Through shared experiences, members begin to feel connected.
The success of a family becomes more important than one person or idea.
Connections come through a common goal and community input.
These councils are much more than just legislative meetings where rules are reinforced, and weekly plans are finalized.
“A family meeting can be an opportunity to clarify expectations, celebrate accomplishments, strengthen communication, teach one another, resolve problems, and build commitment to family time. Without a regular avenue to discuss family issues, miscommunication is common, and problems are often discussed only when they have come to a boil. Such a time is hardly the best time to resolve problems in a loving and cooperative way” (Dennis, 2008).
How many of us get something done without writing it down or scheduling it.
Unfortunately, that is the kind of world we live in, everything from every direction is clamoring for our attention.
If we don’t make time for something, even as simple as “strengthen[ing] communication” within the family, something else will fill our time.
In every other organization and group, meetings are required to attain the goal and supply proper encouragement to keep going.
We need to care half as much about the goals and encouragement within our families, as some do at our jobs.
If we do, our family goals can be realized.
Sources:
Chayko, M. (2002). Connecting: how we form social bonds and communities in the Internet age. Albany, NY: State university of New York Press .
Covey, S. R. (2014). The 7 habits of highly effective people: powerful lessons in personal change(1st ed.). New York: Free Press.
Dennis, S. (2008, October 01). The Benefits of Family Meetings. Retrieved November 17, 2017, from http://www.byui.edu/home-family/the- benefits-of-family-meetings
W., H. (2005, November 12). Strength in numbers. Retrieved November 17, 2017, from https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php? term=strength in numbers