With every song, movie, and TV show eluding to sex, it is hard not to talk about this topic.
Media has found a way to take love and intimacy out of sex, making it just an act.
Intimacy is defined as, “a state of extreme interpersonal emotional closeness such that each party's personal space can be entered without causing discomfort and by any of the other parties to that person. Intimacy is affectionate or loving personal relationship and have a deep understanding of each other” (Nugent, 2015).
By that definition, we come to an understanding that intimacy is a sense of closeness, emotionally and physically.
Nowhere in that definition does it talk outright about sex.
It does however explain that intimacy is an “affectionate”, and a “love personal relationship” (Nugent, 2015).
Those are the feelings that should precede sex or sexual acts.
Research was conducted to measure the effect of sexually explicit music on teenagers.
According to this research, those classified as “heavy listeners” of sexually explicit music, within two years of the study , 51% of the teens started having sex.
As opposed to those teens who classified themselves as listening to little or no sexually degrading music.
Within this group, only 29% started to have sex. (Dirty song lyrics, 2006).
Many want to portray sex as a selfish pursuit; how can I get the most satisfaction out of this experience?
This is not to say that sex should not be enjoyed, but we miss the point when we don’t understand the unification that can take place between two people.
This connection happens for several reasons, one being the release of oxytocin from both the man and the women.
Oxytocin is a chemical that is released that makes those engaging in sex feel connected creating an emotional bond (Sands, 2017).
It is precisely this bond, that would indicate that sex is not meant to just be a stratifying act. It also makes casual sexual encounters, counterproductive.
Dr. Amen a researcher in neuropathy explains this concept.
"Whenever a person is sexually involved with another person, neurochemical changes occur in both their brains that encourage limbic, emotional bonding. Yet limbic bonding is the reason casual sex doesn’t really work for most people on a whole mind and body level. Two people may decide to have sex ‘just for the fun of it,’ yet something is occurring on another level they might not have decided on at all: sex is enhancing an emotional bond between them whether they want it or not. One person, often the woman, is bound to form an a
ttachment and will be hurt when a casual affair ends" (Sands, 2017).
Whether we decided before hand or not, sex is not meant to be casual.
This adds to the pile of problems that can come from teens and others having causal sex.
Many are left with hurt feelings, and misattributed closeness to someone they barely know.
Sex is a wonderful experience, but can become nothing more than a thrill if not held a sacred.
Source
Dirty song lyrics can prompt early teen sex. (2006, August 08). Retrieved November 04, 2017, from http://www.nbcnews.com/id/14227775/ns/health-sexual_health/t/dirty-song-lyrics-can-prompt-early-teen-sex/#.Wf4a8GhSxPY
Nugent, Pam (2015, June 22). What is INTIMACY? definition of INTIMACY (Psychology Dictionary). Retrieved November 04, 2017, from https://psychologydictionary.org/intimacy/
Sands, Bryan (2017, March 07). Sex and Glue: The Emotional Bond of a Physical Act. Retrieved November 04, 2017, from http://everyonelovessex.org/2013/06/sex-and-glue-the-emotional-bond-of-a-physical-act/